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A Living Lie @pencyke
Five on One

(Edited 3/15/2018)

Hi everybody!

How you doin'? In the mood for a story? What a coincidence, I got one right here!

Go ahead and read it, I don't mind :)

"One of the most important skills that will save a ninja's life is taijutsu, the art of the body!"

Those were the words that Kakashi had spoken while effortlessly weaving around the loud boy's attacks. It frustrated the clone how the masked jonin seemed to dance around his fists, disregarding the clone as he read his porn. It burned the clone up inside, being underestimated like that had never sat well with Naruto and it didn't sit well with his clones either. But that didn't stop the boy from taking advantage of the opportunity that underestimation gave him. Taking another swing at his evasive sensei the clone took note of their surroundings. Yes, he recognized that rock. The clone lashed out with a couple more wild kicks and then Kakashi was in position.

The Copy Ninja wasn't truly impressed with the skills Ryuto had shone so far. Sure his fighting style(if you could call it that) was ferocious in it's own clumsy way, but it wasn't anything special. He had caught the slight wandering of the boy's eye and suspected he might've set a trap in the area. Might as well see if whatever trap the boy had cooked up is half decent or not. So Kakashi let himself be maneuvered as he read his Make-Out Paradise.

All the masked jonin really expected was maybe some kind of wire triggered trap, most likely a trip line that might trigger a quick spike trap that could be easily dodged. Going off of just the boy's file(he'd only skimmed it) he didn't even expect that from the boy, but he had some hidden amount of skill it seemed. At least the boy showed some semblance of potential, even if his taijutsu was terrible to the elite ninja. As Kakashi was thinking these thoughts he was actually somewhat surprised when two hands grabbed onto his ankles just as the boy came in for another swing.

Just before the boy's punch landed, Kakashi substituted with a log and the Ryuto clone would have dispelled himself on it had he not insulated himself with a small layer of chakra just in case of these kinds of mishaps. It was an essential part of the plan that everyone think that he was the real Ryuto, and the clone was determined to do his job. He smiled as he listened for the explosion he knew would come and high-fived his fellow clone as he waited, "Nice work, Buddy!" The clone that had just dug itself out of the ground grinned before dispelling, with the parting words, "The job's not over yet!"

A few hundred feet away another tree exploded and the remaining clone took off in that direction.

Sasuke was surprised that Kakashi actually looked slightly ruffled from the class clown's last attack. The last Uchiha smirked as he allowed his ego to swell, if the dead last was able to do that much then it really was guaranteed that the best in the class would get a bell without any kind of effort, flying far and beyond the reach of such imbeciles, ever closer to achieving his revenge.

While Sasuke was ranting to himself(in his head of course) he didn't notice Kakashi sitting right behind him until it was too late, "Um… Shouldn't you be trying to get one of these bells? Y'know, instead of just giggling maniacally at that tree." Sasuke whipped around wide-eyed while the copy nin eye-smiled and performed an impossibly fast set of hand signs.

Suddenly Sasuke was back at his clan's compound, blood running freely across the ground as though it were water staining the bottom of his sandals an unpleasant shade of brown. Sasuke looked up, and there the object of his hatred stood towering far above his seven year old form. Glowing red eyes narrowed at Sasuke's trembling limbs, "You will never be able to kill me, little brother. You are far too weak, you don't have enough hate. You will fail, and when you do I will throw you to the fangirls hog-tied and with nothing to protect your decency!" His lips had parted only marginally, yet the entire sky rumbled with the silhouette's words.


Just a few minutes after the ninja cyclopes left, Sakura wandered into the small clearing and found her crush unconscious on the ground and foaming at the mouth. A moment later she joined him in Mother Earth's serene embrace.

That was when Ryuto entered the scene with his hands in his pockets and a slight slouch in his posture. The disguised boy cast an uncaring eye around the clearing before his gaze finally settled on his unconscious teammates. Naruto silently debated the pros and cons of waking the two on the ground and leaving them to fail. There wasn't much time left, so two non-clone, non-trap distractions could be useful. Oh, and he'd have to show some attempt at teamwork or else he'd fail anyway so there was also that. Ryuto sighed as he dispelled the genjutsu Sasuke was under and he sighed harder when he had to pull out the smelling salts to wake Sakura.

Ryuto waited for their brains to start working before he began, "Hey, you both cognitive?" Two confused nods, "Good. I'm gonna get strait to the point so pay attention. None of us can take on Kakashi and emerge victorious. There's just no way to do it by ourselves. So I propose we work together to get those bells," He raised a hand to stop the oncoming protests, "Before you start arguing about who gets a bell, I've already volunteered to be the one who goes back to the academy. I didn't pass the official test anyway, so I could probably benefit from taking the course again. Are you with me?" Two reluctant nods, "Good," At that point Ryuto pulled out a kunai and began drawing diagrams in the dirt, "So here's the plan. I'm going to continue distracting Kakashi up close, working to move him into that big clearing where we all started, where you two will be lying in wait. When I give the signal Sakura is going to activate all of the kunai traps I have hidden in the underbrush around that clearing. I've hooked them all together to a single trigger wire, located here." He pointed at a spot on his map in the dirt, then looked at Sasuke, "Your job will be the actual extraction. The Kunai are just a diversion to brake Kakashi's concentration, a jonin wouldn't let himself be killed by something so simple. When I give the signal, you're going to substitute with me, snatch the bells and immediately substitute out of there, because when Sakura sets off that trap, trust me you do not want to be there. Okay," Ryuto looked at his teammate's faces, all furrowed in concentration, and felt the beginnings of something that might not have been dislike for them. He crushed the feeling before it could distract him, promising himself to look into it later, "Any questions?"

Sakura raised her hand as if they were still in class, "Um, you said you'd continue distracting Kakashi," Naruto was pretty sure that feeling he was having(whatever it was) wouldn't be coming back any time soon, "But you can't have been doing that. You've been talking with us, and no one can be in two places at once."

Ryuto smiled his fake smile and said, "Actually, I'm just a clone." In a poof he was gone, leaving Sakura and Sasuke to scramble to get to their positions, the drawings in the dirt already forgotten.

Naruto had finished studying Kakashi's movements and figured it was time to step onto the playing field. The clone fighting against the Copy Ninja was almost completely out of energy from the constant substitutions and chakra insulation to make sure he didn't pop, and he also knew from the memories of another clone that Sakura and Sasuke were aware of the plan. The disguised boy carefully watched for his opportunity to switch with the clone and found it when the clone tossed a smoke bomb right at Kakashi's face. The switch was soundless as Naruto changed from an unassuming squirrel to the confident facade that was Ryuto Shota.

Wasting no time, Ryuto charged out of the smoke, hurling kunai ahead of him at where he heard the jonin to be while at the same time pumping chakra into his legs and feet and launched himself past and ahead of the throwing knife. Kakashi dodged and Ryuto landed, backhand already in motion. The move hit nothing but air, but the boy caught his Kunai mid flight and redirected it to where the grey haired sensei's jump would land him. As the jonin latched onto a passing branch to change his trajectory, he said, "You're a lot better than your file implies, you've even got me on the run."

Ryuto immediately switched to a flying kick at the eye-smiling jonin, "You've been holding back."

Kakashi kept on eye-smiling even as he blocked Ryuto's nonstop onslaught of fists and feet, "It wouldn't do if I accidentally killed any of my genin hopefuls."

Ryuto deadpanned even as his fists blurred towards his masked opponent, "Then what was that One Thousand Years of Death thing about?! A lesser man like Dusty would've died for sure if that'd hit! It's a good thing I dodged that or I might not have been fit to be a ninja even if I had survived!"

Kakashi kept on eye smiling, "What? You're still holding a grudge about that old thing? I swear it feels like it's been ages since that happened."

Ryuto's eyes narrowed dangerously, "You can be I'll be holding a grudge, you damn pervert! It's been a day and you're already trying to use my butt! You're even weirder than that guy in the skintight spandex!" Kakashi let his killing intent flare as his fist rocketed forward to make a first impression on Ryuto's face, "Crap!" The boy exploded into a cloud of chakra smoke and Kakashi's exposed eye widened when Ryuto spoke the five words he had said earlier from a position right behind him, "One Thousand Years of Death!"

Only the Copy Ninja's years of combat sharpened reflexes saved him from the infinite doom that was that technique, but as he landed Ryuto was back in his face screaming at the top of his lungs, "NOW!"

With his mind still coming down from the panic that overwhelmed anyone faced with that forbidden technique, Kakashi(against his better judgement) turned towards the sound of thousands of feet of ninja wire recoiling, immediately followed by the sound of thousands of kunai flying through the air at high speeds. He only looked back when he heard the sound Sasuke substituting away with both of the bells. A moment before the wall of black metal hit him, Kakashi did the same.

"As promised, you two can have the bells."

Sakura stared at Ryuto, confusion evident on her face, "Why would you do that? You could have just as easily only included one of us and you still would have passed! Why didn't you? What's your angle? You better not be trying to get a date!" Ryuto sweat dropped at the pinkette's line of questioning.

Ryuto directed a charming smile at Sakura and spoke in an inviting voice, "What's got your panties in a bunch? You passed and so did your precious Sasuke, you should be celebrating. Unless you don't want to be on the same team as Dusty over there? If that's the case then by all means, continue pissing me off." Naruto couldn't believe it, he basically passed that test for her and all Sakura could think to do was interrogate him about why he did it. He was fighting a jonin level ninja for Kami's sake! All she had to do was cut a wire on a trap that he made. I mean Come On! What's a guy have to do around here to get a simple 'Thank you, you're so awesome, I wish I could be like you, Ryuto!'

Naruto would've been content to live his fantasies in silence as they waited for their sensei to show up, but Sasuke had decided to use his tongue for something other than eating tomatoes, "You, you're stronger than you let on. I agree with Sakura. You could've gotten those bells yourself." With his statement done, Sasuke struck a pose and Sakura poured everyone a round of 'Sasuke's coolness', of which Ryuto did not partake.

"Sorry to burst your bubble Dusty, but the world doesn't revolve around me. Kakashi was obviously holding way back. He only struck back at me once and if it'd hit we wouldn't be having this conversation."

Sasuke narrowed his eyes but it was Sakura who spoke, "And what was up with that totally perverted technique you tried to use on Kakashi!? What are you a pervert or something?" Sasuke was curious about that as well, it was a vile technique but he'd be lying if he didn't say it wasn't useful.

Ryuto's eyes caught a dangerous glint as he turned casually, "Oh that? That was just payback."

"Payback huh? Maybe I should get some too?"

Ryuto felt a heavy hand on his shoulder and as he turned to look at Kakashi standing behind him he could only think of one thing to say, "Crap!"


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1. Chapter 1 3061 0 0 2. The second chapter 2732 0 0 3. Third time's the charm! 2789 0 0 4. Four Man Team! 2365 0 0 5. Five on One 2229 0 0 6. Six Eyes Watching Me 2654 0 0 7. (Un)Lucky Team Seven 2637 0 0 8. Ate the Dust 3084 0 0 9. Nine Tales 2692 0 0 10. Pending Ignition…10…9… 2800 0 0 11. Cranked up to Eleven 3131 0 0 12. Twelve Tolls of Death's Bell 1761 0 0 13. Baker's Dozen 1970 0 0 14. Break time 3032 0 0 15. Tantrums Work! 2291 0 0 16. Oh boy, FLASHBACKS! 1110 0 0 17. Smoke signals 2153 0 0 18. Great Acting 2812 0 0 19. Days Spent Well 4242 0 0 20. The First Bout 2116 0 0 21. Sasuke vs Kiba 1170 0 0 22. Sakura vs Tenten 1579 0 0 23. The Rest of the Prelims 3112 0 0 24. Emergency Therapy Session! 3230 0 0 25. A Real Bad Time 3083 0 0 26. True to Form 2871 0 0 27. Impact 2434 0 0 28. Aftermath 2859 0 0 29. Day 1 2520 0 0 30. Memory Lane 2884 0 0 31. Midnight Stakeout 3346 0 0 32. Tournament Part 1 3358 0 0 33. Tournament Part 2 2864 0 0 34. Tournament Part 3 2300 0 0