Oprona @potato
I

Izuku exists, and everything is normal. That’s all that matters, doesn’t it? He’s alive, he exists, and he moves on. What he’s done, what he could have done, that doesn’t matter. He exists. The world spins.

Izuku exists, and the world moves on. 

He works as [a hero, a villain, a vigilante - anything and anywhere in between] a barista in a dead end coffee shop. It’s not much, but it pays the bills. Bills that keep racking up each month for whatever reason, whether it’s the rent or his insurance, or whatever. It doesn’t matter. At the end of the month, everything gets paid and he isn’t in any debt. 

He works as [a hero, a villain, a vigilante - anything and anywhere in between] a barista in a dead end coffee shop. It’s not much, but it pays the bills. Bills that keep racking up each month for whatever reason, whether it’s the rent or his insurance, or whatever. It doesn’t matter. At the end of the month, everything gets paid and he isn’t in any debt. 

It isn’t quite living, but Izuku survives - the only way he knows how. He may no longer have the dreams of his youth, but he doesn’t quite think he needs them anymore. Even if the world seems a bit more grey day by day, he’s alive. That’s all that matters. 

He remembers the days when he could barely get out of bed, when he was just going through the motions after he realized his dreams weren’t ever going to be achieved. Not by him, not really by anyone. He dreamed of the impossible, wanted to do the impossible. Those days, when he stared at the ceiling and wanted to die, but couldn’t find the desire to do so. He stepped down from that rooftop, and thankfully he never stepped back up onto it, no matter how attractive that option was in moments like those. 

Sometimes, he wonders what would have happened if he had, in a cathartic sense of wondering. If the world would have mourned for him, if those who hated him would have regretted it. Or if he would have just been another statistic people pointed at to prove a point. It doesn’t matter though, Izuku is alive, and even if he had done so, he would never have known. The dead don’t interact with the living. 

He remembers the days after that, when he was possessed with a burning rage at the world, at his previous desires, at himself for being so foolish. When he tore down the posters, sold his merchandise to people who would have actually wanted it. Even then, he didn’t have the heart to actually destroy them. He doesn’t think he ever would have, no matter how angry he became. For at the end of it, he was angry at himself more than anything or anyone else, no matter how justified he might have been. 

He remembers burning his notebooks, throwing them into the fire. Izuku regrets that now, for he knows the amount of work he had put into them, the amount of care, and wishes he could look back at that. Could look back at days when he saw the world in more than muted shades of grey. He might be alive, but Izuku knows he’s not living. 

He’s not living, for he has no true desires. Some would say that he is just content, happy with the life he has. He’s not. Izuku wants more, desires more than just the life he has now, but as for what he isn’t sure. He wants more, but not what he wants. Maybe he wishes to return to the days where he had those impossible dreams, but Izuku knows that would have killed him. 

Is it better to be alive, or to die whilst he lives and not just survives? Izuku chose to be alive, not to live. It would be more accurate to say that he isn’t dead yet, that he is just waiting for his life to expire. Maybe he’s just a midlife crisis waiting to happen, where he does go back to the dreams of his youth as an adult. 

Maybe he could have been something more, something great. Someone accomplished, someone who others could look at and point to, someone who others want to be. Someone, who at the end of the day would be only human. Because that is what he is - only human. He is not great, not accomplished - he is but a man moving day to day, someone not all that dissimilar from anyone else he passes by. 

Izuku remembers the days after that, when he calmed - when he had taken a look around and had continued with his life. When he had settled, had went to highschool, and then onto college, and then taking a job as a Barista to pay the bills. It’s enough - it could be more, but it isn’t. Izuku is satisfied with that. 

He is not a hero, not someone who spends his days saving the masses and receiving accolades and praise. He wishes he was, in a sense - wishes for the could have been, where he picked himself up and said fuck you to the world and became a hero anyways out of spite. Wishes that he could have, but at the end of the day… he did not. He could not - not truly. Maybe anyone with enough motivation would have been, but that is it - he didn’t have enough motivation to truly do it. 

He wished, and wished, and held onto a pipe dream - one he did not put any effort into. He knows how much he wished for it, but at the end, he didn’t truly have that motivation to say fuck you, I’m doing this anyways. He had enough to pick himself up from the dust and continue on, and for him that is enough.

It will only ever be enough. And that - this mediocre life - is good enough for him. He might not live the grand life, but who is he to discount those just like him, who work their jobs and go home, who live it day by day, who aren’t doing anything that the world would call great? He is doing what he needs to, what he wants to, when he wants to. 

There is a sense of relief in this life, the sense where he is almost… free. There aren’t any real expectations on him, a small-time barista, a man who works a 9 to 5 job in a city, just like anybody else. He could pack up tomorrow, leave for wherever, and quit his job. He could go out, become a hero, become a villain, become a vigilante, become someone… else. He won’t, but he could, and that is all that he needs. He can dream, he can think, he can hope for something he will never achieve, and that is all he needs. Izuku is satisfied.

There is no pressure in this life to become better, become greater. No stress, worrying about the next villain, the next fight, the next ranking. No worrying if he is doing enough, if he could be doing more. He is enough - Izuku, the small time barista in a small city in Japan is enough. It’s enough for him, no matter what anyone else thinks. 

Perhaps he could have done more, have been more. But he didn’t. And for Izuku, he is enough. He shall always be enough, no matter what he does. He could do anything, go anywhere, and he would always be enough. What he does, where he goes - it doesn’t matter. Izuku is enough. 

Perhaps, one day, Izuku will die. Will die, old and wrinkled, having lived a life he was happy with - not one that will go down in history, but one that has made him happy. Maybe he’ll be surrounded by children, grandchildren, and friends - surrounded by the people who loved him and who he loved back. That will be enough for him. 

Izuku met someone, recently - a schoolteacher for a local pre-school, around his age. They make him happy, and he hopes he makes them happy. Perhaps they’ll have a great future together - one that continues until they die. If not lovers, then at least as good friends.

Izuku is looking at a promotion, a raise in his salary - he’s not a bad barista, and the owners of the shop love him - an older couple whose children have never shown interest in the small shop. They’re thinking of giving him the business, provided that he can prove he’ll manage it well. He hasn’t failed them yet. He hopes he will never, for he loves them as family as much as they love him. 

Izuku is thinking of moving into a larger apartment. His circle is growing and as much as his landlord is nice, a one room apartment isn’t quite the best place to have a group of people over in. Or another person, really… he barely fits in it as much as it is, and he certainly has the money to purchase a new place. 

There are no what-ifs, no could-have-beens. There is just Izuku, and his life - his 9 to 5 job, his apartment, the daily commute, the friends he has. And that is what it always will be. He will never be great, but he never needed to be. All he needed was to be Izuku, and he knows that - has learned that, after all these years. It had taken a long time, but, even still. He has learned, he has accepted it. He is Izuku, and he is enough. 

Izuku will become insignificant in the grand scheme of things, and that is fine with him. That is fine for everyone, anyone at all who does not achieve great accolades and praise. He is enough - they are enough. All of them are enough. 

The world can spin on, the villains and the heroes can fight, fires and earthquakes and tsunamis can happen. The sun and moon rotate, bringing about a new day, and Izuku doesn’t care. He exists. He is enough, and the world moves on. It never needed him, but Izuku never needed it. All he needed was to be enough, and that is what he is. 

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