The Longing of the Heart @otherealmwriter
Katyusha's journal 6

You've gotten it plenty of times on who owns Hetalia and it ain't me. Like I said before I am aiming to get this story wrapped up soon, so enough of this A/N, on with the fic!

October 17th 1918

(From the diary of Katyusha Braginsky)

I feel almost as I have to keep Fredka and Natalya focused on what Vanya would want them to. Natalya tells me all the time how much she misses him and misses how he was with the children and I know how often both of them go to his grave and talk. At least in order to set a good example for her children she doesn't head out underdressed for the changing weather and she does know they will need to go play or stay in the warmth. She has focused on them a lot since she got the news. Matvey told her (and Fredka too for that matter) that revenge would never satisfy their hurt and it wouldn't bring Vanya back but they needed to focus on their kids as they were some of Vanya's favorite things in the world and to honor him they should raise them to be the good smart people I know they are. Little Nikolai is such a good brother to his siblings. I swear Anya is the spitting image of her mother with her father's eyes and hair color.

Matvey has been coming by more and more often lately, especially when he had finally gotten a job of his own and he wouldn't have to worry about living off the meager disabled veteran's pension he was promised. He hasn't gotten it yet, legal hold ups, governments never want to pay for a disabled soldier. He comes by when he isn't having a panic attack or feeling bad. It's just so nice to have him over when he doesn't need medical care. Don't get me wrong, I want to take care of him. I like to but he's a good friend. I mean as much as Matvey getting a decent job does not make up for losing Vanya, it is something. A sign of light in the darkness, a ray of hope that things will get better. Almost as if that he may physically be gone from our lives, other than the grave that Natalya and Fredka seem to be almost habitually obsessed to talking to, his presence is felt in other ways in our lives. I know he did not know Matvey as well as I do, they never had time to properly get acquainted outside of Fredka and Natalya's wedding and birth of Nikolai but he would have liked him.

So how was that? Good? Bad? Short? Long? Let me know in a review. I don't have much else to add with this so remember to read (well you just did) and to review. Ciao for now,

otherrealmwriter

aka

Realm.

Anonymous reviews have been disabled. Login to review. 1. Alfred's Journal 447 0 0 2. Natalya's Journal 344 0 0 3. Ivan's Journal 357 0 0 4. Alfred's Journal 2 433 0 0 5. Natalya's Journal 2 384 0 0 6. Ivan's Journal 2 398 0 0 7. Alfred's Journal 3 335 0 0 8. Natalya's Journal 3 357 0 0 9. Ivan's Journal 3 361 0 0 10. Letter to Matthew 473 0 0 11. Letter to Alfred 498 0 0 12. Alfred's Journal 4 393 0 0 13. Natalya's Journal 4 425 0 0 14. Ivan's Journal 4 415 0 0 15. Alfred's Journal 5 409 0 0 16. Natalya's Journal 5 388 0 0 17. Ivan's Journal 5 394 0 0 18. Letter to Matthew 2 548 0 0 19. Letter to Alfred 2 504 0 0 20. Alfred's Journal 6 346 0 0 21. Natalya's Journal 6 459 0 0 22. Ivan's Journal 6 453 0 0 23. Alfred's Journal 7 459 0 0 24. Natalya's Journal 7 570 0 0 25. Ivan's Journal 7 442 0 0 26. Letter to Matthew 3 590 0 0 27. Letter to Alfred 3 452 0 0 28. Alfred's Journal 8 467 0 0 29. Natalya's Journal 8 428 0 0 30. Ivan's Journal 8 470 0 0 31. Alfred's Journal 9 450 0 0 32. Natalya's Journal 9 417 0 0 33. Ivan's Journal 9 455 0 0 34. Letter to Matthew 4 560 0 0 35. Letter to Alfred 4 518 0 0 36. Alfred's Journal 10 500 0 0 37. Natalya's Journal 10 425 0 0 38. Ivan's Journal 10 412 0 0 39. Alfred's Journal 11 393 0 0 40. Natalya's Journal 11 363 0 0 41. Ivan's Journal 11 560 0 0 42. From Lt Col Kirkland 518 0 0 43. Alfred's Journal 12 417 0 0 44. Natalya's Journal 12 415 0 0 45. Ivan's Journal 12 493 0 0 46. Ivan's Journal 13 537 0 0 47. Katyusha's Journal 361 0 0 48. Matthew's Journal 491 0 0 49. Alfred's Journal 13 508 0 0 50. Matthew's Journal 2 442 0 0 51. Alfred's journal 14 480 0 0 52. Ivan's Letter home 455 0 0 53. Alfred's journal 15 497 0 0 54. Natalya's Journal 13 528 0 0 55. Matthew's Journal 3 410 0 0 56. Katyusha's letter to Ivan 614 0 0 57. Ivan's Letter to Katyusha 550 0 0 58. Alfred's Journal 16 484 0 0 59. Natalya's Journal 14 538 0 0 60. Katyusha's journal 2 523 0 0 61. Letter to Ivan 564 0 0 62. Ivan's letter to Alfred 518 0 0 63. Alfred's Journal 17 472 0 0 64. Natalya's Journal 15 515 0 0 65. Matthew's Journal 4 427 0 0 66. Ivan's Journal 14 627 0 0 67. Alfred's Journal 18 344 0 0 68. Letter from Ernest 509 0 0 69. Ivan's Journal 15 353 0 0 70. Alfred's Journal 19 483 0 0 71. Natalya's Journal 16 453 0 0 72. Matthew's Journal 5 558 0 0 73. Katyusha's journal 3 412 0 0 74. Ivan's Journal 16 370 0 0 75. Katyusha's journal 4 487 0 0 76. Alfred's Journal 20 479 0 0 77. Natalya's Journal 17 413 0 0 78. Matthew's journal 6 380 0 0 79. Alfred's Journal 21 439 0 0 80. Natalya's journal 18 463 0 0 81. Katyusha's Journal 5 368 0 0 82. Alfred's Journal 22 451 0 0 83. Natalya's Journal 19 459 0 0 84. Katyusha's journal 6 398 0 0 85. Alfred's Journal 23 478 0 0 86. Natalya's Journal 20 332 0 0 87. Katyusha's Journal 7 491 0 0 88. Natalya's Journal 21 405 0 0 89. Matthew's Journal 7 432 0 0 90. Natalya's Journal 22 486 0 0 91. Alfred's Journal 24 598 0 0 92. Alfred's Journal 25 484 0 0 93. Natalya's Journal 23 422 0 0 94. Matthew's Journal 8 393 0 0 95. Alfred's Journal 26 475 0 0 96. Natalya's Journal 24 472 0 0 97. Katyusha's Journal 8 443 0 0 98. Matthew's Journal 9 533 0 0 99. Alfred's Journal 27 717 0 0 100. Ivan's Journal 17 409 0 0